Blog IV: Developing Final Text

The writer did a good job of incorporating the comments and revisions given to her during the whole process of writing which culminated in the final text of the cover letter. The construction and rhetoric of the first and third paragraphs in the cover letter changed significantly from the draft to the final text. The writer started out with a mediocre introduction to why she was a great candidate for the position and what skills she possessed that would prove so. From the comments that were provided by Professor Wible, the writer was able to elaborate on what made her an attractive and desirable candidate. In the draft of the cover letter, an almost pedestrian and vague tone announced that the writer had been an undergraduate studying civil engineering at WVU and had held several jobs. This part of the document was greatly improved in the final draft. The writer was specific about the internship he or she had held at Mylan Pharmaceutical Co. and the more assertive tone and rhetoric establishes the writer as being able to bring experience as an intern that Thrasher desires. In the final text the writer follows the criteria for the introduction found in the Peer Review Cover Letters handout (pg 11). The reader is informed of why the letter was written, what job position is being seeked, and reasons why the writer wants to work for that company. When piecing together the final text, it is evident that the writer took Professor Wible's comments into consideration and revised her work to better fit what he'd described.
The third paragraph also went through a considerable amount of change and I believe it was because the writer looked at, again, comments made on her draft by Professor Wible about what should be included in the paragraph to make a stronger impression. The writer obviously did her research and found that Thrasher, being a small and versatile company, was looking for an equally versatile intern. In describing her role as intern at the Mylan Pharmaceutical Company she is able to highlight those attributes that would benefit Thrasher if she was to get the position. This body paragraph closely resembles the format shown in the Example Cover Letter (p 27) which I think worked out great for the goal this cover letter had. In her final text the writer includes specific evidence, such as X,Y, and Z. This was a point provided both by point 5 in the Peer Review Questions and Professor Wible's comments on the draft of the cover letter.
The writer kept in mind the notes both from her brainstorming and also the Writer's Job Skills Freewrite (p 21). She clearly followed instructions on how to successfully complete those assignments and because her notes were clear and straightforward, she was able to revise her draft cover letter and produce an excellent cover letter.